A bell should be the gnome queen, that would end well!
Re: GNOMES
Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 7:55 pm
by DanielH
Bluelantern: Not necessarily; sometimes “Queen” is not a very interesting role. I’m particularly thinking of Chronicle dragons.
Gnome invaders:
What have you done with the usual account owner?
What do you want in a gnome queen?
What sort of red hats? Do you have fedoras in particular?
I hope Shmebulock feels better soon.
Re: GNOMES
Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 8:19 pm
by Timepoof
WHO OR WHAT IS A BELL?
WE HAVE JUST HACKED HER ACCOUNT, SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO RESTORE IT AFTER WE ARE DONE.
WE WANT LOYALTY, A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR AND A CREATIVE MIND.
YES. WE HAVE ALL THE KINDS OF RED HATS, INCLUDING THOSE. WOULD YOU LIKE SOME IN EXCHANGE FOR SOMETHING ELSE?
THANK YOU. SHMEBULOCK SAYS "SHMEBULOCK".
Re: GNOMES
Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 8:35 pm
by MaggieoftheOwls
I don't have a queen available, but I could maybe help you write love poetry once you find a prospect in exchange for some fezzes.
Re: GNOMES
Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 8:45 pm
by Timepoof
ALRIGHT. WOULD YOU LIKE A DESIGN ON YOUR FEZZES?
Re: GNOMES
Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 8:54 pm
by Aestrix
VICTORY FOR THE LEPRECHAUNS!
LEPRECHAUN VICTORY
Timepoof: HELLO CENTAUR. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY RED HATS?
Aestrix: No, thank you, I was recently sold half a truckload of blue hats and I really feel like these are too many hats
Aestrix: And buying red hats would just make it worse
Aestrix: What would I even do with that many hats, I only have one head, and can only wear one hat at a time!
Timepoof: YOU COULD BUY QUALITY RED HATS FROM US AND SELL YOUR BLUE HATS WHICH WERE PROBABLY MADE BY LEPRECHAUNS. THEY ARE OUR MAIN COMPETITION IN THE HAT BUSINESS
Aestrix: The guy that sold me the blue hat did look pretty shifty. Are Leprechauns pretty shifty people?
Timepoof: YES. THEY ARE SNEAKY AND SHIFTY, UNLIKE US HONEST GNOMES.
Aestrix: Dangit! If only I'd met you sooner, trustworthy gnome
Aestrix: If you can help me sell my blue hats I can buy your red hats
Timepoof: YES, OF COURSE. HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PRICE BLUE HATS AND HOW MUCH RED ONES?
Aestrix: What currency do the noble gnomes work in, traditionally?
Aestrix: I've been using the unicorn currency of leprechaun gold, but it might be counterfeit
Aestrix: You know those unicorns.
Timepoof: WE ARE QUITE FLEXIBLE, AS WE HAVE DIVERSE CUSTOMERS. WE DO PREFER TO USE MORE RELIABLE CURRENCIES BUT IF THAT IS ALL YOU HAVE WE CAN MAKE DO.
Aestrix: Oh, really? Oh, that's fantastic, I'll be able to buy more red hats with the extra leprechaun gold I have from the leprechauns - okay, well, I have 428 blue hats
Timepoof: I THINK A RATIO OF 2 BLUE HATS PER RED HAT IS QUITE FAIR, CONSIDERING THE QUALITY. THAT LEAVES 214 RED HATS FOR YOU
Aestrix: Hmmmm, yeah, that's acceptable to me. You won't mind selling the low quality hats?
Timepoof: NOT AT ALL. WE WOULD OF COURSE WRITE DISCLAIMERS, UNLIKE THE LEPRECHAUNS, SO IT MIGHT TAKE A WHILE, BUT IT'S BETTER THAN LYING.
Aestrix: That's quite fair!
Aestrix: I'll be sure to recommend gnome merchants to my friends
Aestrix: All right, where do I ship the blue hats to?
Timepoof: 3487, DORNBERT STREET, SOUTH FLOGGY.
Aestrix: All right!
Timepoof: THANK YOU. YOU ARE A NICE AND SMART CENTAUR. TELL THE OTHERS ABOUT THE LEPRECHAUNS.
Aestrix: Of course!
Aestrix: <3
Aestrix: So I got the UPS to ship at ludicrous speed, the hats should arrive in...
Aestrix: ...
Aestrix: Oh. Now. They should arrive now.
Timepoof: WE GOT THE HATS. WE ARE SENDING THE RED ONES, BUT WE HAVE RATHER SLOWER SHIPPING BECAUSE OF THE BUDGET. WE HAVE SENT THEM JUST NOW. THEY WILL ARRIVE IN 5 MINUTES
Aestrix: Excellent, thank you
Aestrix: The hats have arrived and they are in excellent condition
Aestrix: And the illusioned blue hats should be fading from existence right about now. ;)
Timepoof: WHAT?! YOU SCAMMER! OUR HATS!!! NNNOOOOO!!!!
Aestrix: Gnomes: 0, Leprechauns: 1
Aestrix: :)
Aestrix: Next time verify that you're talking to a centaur.
Aestrix: BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN A LEPRECHAUN THIS ENTIRE TIME, MEEEHEEEHEEHEE!
Timepoof: :(
Re: GNOMES
Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 9:16 pm
by DanielH
I didn’t realize I was getting into the middle of a dispute here, although from this it does look like the gnomes are better trading partners.
A Bell is a type of person who is very good at some jobs describable as “queen”, but not necessarily all of them.
What does a gnome queen do? The word is a bit ambiguous in this language; it might mean a political ruler, a religious figure, or the mother of an entire generation.
Re: GNOMES
Posted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 10:06 pm
by MaggieoftheOwls
Mm, thank you for offering, but no, aside from the tassel I'd prefer solid red.
Re: GNOMES
Posted: Sat Apr 02, 2016 1:25 am
by Timepoof
A QUEEN IS A POLITICAL RULER WHO ALSO TAKES CARE OF US. SHE MUST MARRY ALL ONE THOUSAND OF US AND BECOME OUR GNOME QUEEN FOR ALL OF ETERNITY.