I wrote a short story!

[Eva]

Salvage, < 2,000 words.

Features Dr. Realist, Eva, and Isabella.

It is the very first thing I have written which could be reasonably called a short story. PEACH! (Please Evaluate and Critique Honestly!)

[DanielH]

It’s an interesting story! I like the contrast between the different characters’ perspectives. I agree with Dr. Realist’s point that people would probably pay in memories too casually, but I don’t think it would actually be wrong in every case like he seems to.

I expect that I would have been lost if I was not already familiar with the OTC and characters, but that’s hard to judge. I also know that I did get lost in some of the dialogue; it could probably have used some more tags for who was speaking. I know that it’s hard to strike a good balance between overtagging and undertagging, but I think this was definitely on the latter side.

I was somewhat surprised that Dr. Realist encouraged Eva to peek at the memories against the privacy regulations; I thought he cared about privacy more. That isn’t about the story per se, just about my impression of his character from the subset of MWF I’ve read.

[rockeye_stonetoe]

I found the translation of the catalog items into phrasing Isabella would understand charming.

[Unbitwise]

For the sake of the community page could you insert a cut tag somewhere early on?

[Eva]

For the sake of the community page could you insert a cut tag somewhere early on?

Sorry! Fixed.

[Bluelantern]

I agree that it could have used more "who is speaking tags" but my general feel about the subject is "either do every single line or don't do it at all"

Also, that was really interesting and got really sad pretty fast. Loved this short.

I found the translation of the catalog items into phrasing Isabella would understand charming.

I liked that too.

[Ezra]

Good story, I like it!

[Eva]

Yay at all the positive feedback!

I'll make sure to fix the speech tags problem if I ever go back and edit this again. (Which is surprisingly likely?)

Some discussion questions just because:

1: Who's in the right and who's in the wrong in this piece?
2: What decision does Eva-the-character make in the end?

@DanielH: Realist isn't actually a very nice person. He means well, but his methods can be a bit extreme at times.

[Aestrix]

Actually this short story made me want to have an OTC equivalent of Milliways, where people get a door to the junk shop of the multiverse. So uh, I think that's an achievement there.

To actually talk about discussion questions: I mean, I think Isabella's the most in the right here. They're her memories, just how much she'll be changed by their loss is something only she can really know, and if she thinks the cost is worth it - well, that's that, isn't it. OTC's a bit morally questionable here for trading in memories at all, but not actually evil or automatically wrong for doing so. Maybe they're wrong if they back desperate people into a corner, but just the option itself isn't bad.

In my opinion, though, Realist and Eva are both wrong. Eva more than Realist, because customer confidentiality is a thing that should be respected instead of, you know. Not. She didn't have the authority to access the memories, and she really shouldn't have. Realist strikes me as - arrogant, is the word I'm looking for. Condescending towards Isabella. 'No I am right, you are wrong, my view is correct and there are no alternatives possible.' And then he encouraged Eva to invade Isabella's privacy.

The short story was great, but I like Realist less now because of it. Which is fun, I am pleased with this.

I read the ending as Eva-the-character deciding against regaining the memories, but maybe that's because I wanted to pretend she's going to stop peeking in memories she shouldn't be.

[Eva]

Actually this short story made me want to have an OTC equivalent of Milliways, where people get a door to the junk shop of the multiverse. So uh, I think that's an achievement there.

To actually talk about discussion questions: I mean, I think Isabella's the most in the right here. They're her memories, just how much she'll be changed by their loss is something only she can really know, and if she thinks the cost is worth it - well, that's that, isn't it. OTC's a bit morally questionable here for trading in memories at all, but not actually evil or automatically wrong for doing so. Maybe they're wrong if they back desperate people into a corner, but just the option itself isn't bad.

In my opinion, though, Realist and Eva are both wrong. Eva more than Realist, because customer confidentiality is a thing that should be respected instead of, you know. Not. She didn't have the authority to access the memories, and she really shouldn't have. Realist strikes me as - arrogant, is the word I'm looking for. Condescending towards Isabella. 'No I am right, you are wrong, my view is correct and there are no alternatives possible.' And then he encouraged Eva to invade Isabella's privacy.

The short story was great, but I like Realist less now because of it. Which is fun, I am pleased with this.

I read the ending as Eva-the-character deciding against regaining the memories, but maybe that's because I wanted to pretend she's going to stop peeking in memories she shouldn't be.

Author-Interpretations of the Theme and Conflict and So On of this piece, please do not read before posting your own interpretation

---

In my opinion, both the arguments in this piece - Realist Vs. Isabella, and Realist Vs. Eva - are pieces of the same larger conflict. I would phrase it as "Is escapism ever justifiable?"
Realist is of the opinion that escapism is never justifiable. He clashes with Isabella (who's trying to escape her past), and Eva (who's trying to escape her present).

I would say that in the first case Realist is wrong, but in the second case he's right. He uses terrible methods to make his point, but he makes it successfully.
I might even venture to say that his argument is correct in the general case - running from your problems is a bad idea - but by applying it indiscriminately, he ends up being heartless, even cruel. Even the best of principles becomes tyranny if it does not admit exceptions.

In the end, Eva decides to accept her mistakes and start to act to improve the world around her. Whether this involves her actually recovering the memories she shouldn't have is up to the reader, but in my interpretation she does. (She is ultimately a Sensate, and accepting terrible experiences as part of the world is a core part of their philosophy. As for the breach of privacy - she already made that mistake: she's just decided to admit it.)