Alicornutopia

Inspired by Alicorn's "I Will Arrange Bells On Spectrums" thread:

Tell me one of my templates and a thing to sort them by, and I will either produce a sorting with commentary, or declare that I have no idea/that template does not sort by that thing. "Sort by" can either be a spectrum or a categorization - like, if for some reason you wanted me to sort not-yet-appeared Jokers by their prospective PBs, that would not really be a spectrum but I could do it anyway.

You can also ask for things involving multiple templates if that makes sense, like sorting Kingfisher-Rayne pairs by emotional closeness.

Someone already asked for Jokers by terribleness of their backstories, so I'll attempt to get around to that at some point soonish.

Libbies by sinisterness of organizations?

random.sort(jokers)

Jokers by Terribleness of Backstory:

Ordered from least to most terrible. Notation is name - cluster - Joker Sexual Assault Index, where 4 stands for "none", 3 stands for "one or a small number of scattered incidents", 2 stands for "something serial but temporary or a long time spent experiencing infrequent incidents", and 1 stands for "a significant amount over an extended period of time". By and large, terribleness of backstory correlates very strongly with the Index, so Jokers who appear out of order according to this categorization are marked with *asterisks. If you don't know who a particular Joker is/where they come from, feel free to ask. Some Jokers omitted, particularly ones without names. Jokers without names who are included are denoted by [World].

Jellybean - A - 4
Micaiah - A - 4
Harley - A - 4 (ordered according to what happened when his destiny caught up with him, otherwise he'd be up top)
Feral - A - 4
Loel - A - 3
Kas - A - 3
Alice - A - 3
Surprise - A - 3
Jun - A - 3
Aelare - A - 3
Ghosty - A - 3
Joker - A - 3
Beast - A - 3
*Teah - Multiple clusters - 1
*Joy - Unclustered - 4
Sue/War - A - 2
Rolan - D - 2
Victor - 1 - 2
Furnace - A - 2
Lalita - 0 - 2
[Everlasting] - A - 2
Queenie - A - 2
Ruin - Special - 1
Jade - C - 1
Sigyn - C - 1
Nona - C - 1
Mercy - A - 1
*Brilliance - 0 - 3
Morrigan - B - 1
Felicity - B - 1
Trick - B - 1
Caprice - B - 1
Trouble - B - 1
Cindy - B - 1
Fire - Unclustered - 1
Celo - Unclustered - 1
Corona - B - 1
Winter - A - 1 (includes things that have not happened to him yet, or he'd be somewhere around Queenie)
Aianon (& Ninyth) - 1 - 1
[Unknowable] - 1 - 1

NB: It's possible that if the Jokers themselves were asked to make this ranking, they would collectively be somewhat inclined to put Joy between Celo and Corona. There's also some squishiness - like, if you asked me to do this again on a different day with no memory of the first round, I might shift Brilliance down below Celo and move Lalita up above Victor. Both of those things are because the spectrum is kind of rating on two separate but related axes - how much the Joker suffered, and how much damage was done. Joy is one of the lowest on suffering, but one of the highest on damage. Brilliance is higher on suffering than the bulk of the B cluster, but lower on damage, although his damage is very differently flavoured so it's hard to tell.

Ooooh, a list of Jokers with their clusters next to them! <3 (Though Corona's there twice, help?)

I have no idea where the allegedly C-clustered Corona came from, but he didn't belong where he ended up and I have gotten rid of him.

Also, it occurs to me that I could put pixiethread and sandbox Jokers on here too... hmm.

Edit: Non-Effulgence Jokers are now on the list in italics. I will explain why Ruin's cluster is "Special" if someone asks. XD

I'm actually curious what the clusters are more generally; feel free to link me if it's been explained before and I'm just bad at remembering things (because... yes, yes I am) but I suppose that counts as "why is Ruin's cluster Special"? xD

Also, a guess: it is related to the fact that in the spreadsheet there is a Sherlock with the same facecast.

Jokers on a right-now-happiness scale?

I don't remember where I last explained it, so explaining it again is quicker. XD

Clusters in a nutshell:

Lettered clusters (A, B, C, D) are configurations of backstory which could produce a Joker who would enact the events of The Dark Knight indistinguishably from canon. You've seen at least one example of every cluster, I think, but to recap - A is commonest and have Awful Dads who beat them; B is second-commonest but might not remain that way, and have Awful Stepdads who molest them; C are female (except for Sigyn whose local setting is genderswapped in a relevant way) and have Awful Dads (a Mom in Sigyn's case) who molest them; D are orphans who end up in shitty, shitty orphanages full of shitty, shitty people.

Numbered clusters (0, 1) are configurations of backstory which could not produce a Joker who would enact the events of TDK as per canon. The 0 cluster (Brilliance, Lalita) are manufactured or engineered in some way to serve as weapons. The 1 cluster (Aianon/Ninyth, Victor) are bred or created as heirs or avatars of powerful evil forces.

The reason why Ruin's cluster is "Special" is indeed related to that fact! They share a body.

Libbies by Sinisterness of Organization, increasing:

Asterisk* denotes overt power, e.g. king, empress, god. Non-Effulgence (future Pixiethreads, in both cases) in italics. Aelise is ranked according to the inclusion of Chelsa; in a hundred years when she's transitioned out of the Chelsa era, she will belong somewhere in the Ealasiva-Ilsa range. Also, they seem to sort handily into categories. I observe that all the ones partnered with Jokers (Ealasiva, Erzsi, Ilsa) head the Dramatically Benign category. Annnnnd I may be being slightly unfair to Dana, but spoilers tra la la. >.>

Dramatically Benign - significant positive effect with no or minimal shady underpinnings/ethical tradeoffs:
Ealasiva*
Erzsi*
Ilsa*
Eliza
[Narnia]*
Elysse*

Neutral - lacks what you could reasonably call an "organization":
Lissa
Cordy
Elocira
Elyth
Eliane
Ashtoreth
Lizbeth
James
Lotte
Lizzie

Moriarty - operates a criminal network of some kind:
Prof. Cherry
Libby
Beth
Slipstick
Elle
Tower

Special - the two worst ones, here for entirely different reasons:
Aelise*
Dana